When You’ve Been Cheated On And You Start Acting Out

Getting cheated on sucks.

It effs up your sense of safety and starts to mess with how you see yourself.

At first, you might just feel broken. Then angry. Then maybe cold or distant. It’s a common behavior in partners who have been cheated on and choose to stay in the relationship. They often can’t help but justifying some pretty harmful behaviors.

Destructive Entitlement Explained In Real Life

You’re probably not even familiar with the term “destructive entitlement” back then.

You’ve been betrayed. And there’s a part of you that feels like you have the right right to act however the hell you want because of the trauma you’ve experienced.

You might not cheat on you partner to get back, but there’s other things you’re doing.

You might be argumentative and harsh. Passive-aggressive. Guilt-trippy. In the back of your mind, you’re thinking that they kinda deserve it.

You feel stuck but also deep down, you know you’re hurting your partner, your relationship. And ultimately, yourself.

The Problem With Justifying Harmful Behavior

Destructive entitlement is when you act out your pain in ways that hurt your partner—and you feel justified doing it.

The logic is along the lines of, “You hurt me, so I get to hurt you back so you don’t ever forget.”

You’re right.

You fall into these patterns that feel justified.

But you know that doesn’t really fix anything. It creates distance. It kills trust. And it usually makes you feel worse in the long run.

If the betrayal didn’t kill your relationship, destructive entitlement might.

You can be right or you can be related.

Is Destructive Entitlement Keeping You Stuck?

It might not be just the betrayal and the trauma that is keeping you stuck but also in the way that destructive entitlement is showing up day after day.

The past is still dominating your here and now, but you’re the one doing it. You’re trying to fix something they didn’t break.

You’re stuck.

Because, it’s not going to be the thing that puts the past in the past. It’s keeping you focused on the past, reliving the trauma, reliving the disappointment. Keeping you angry.

Letting Go of the Past

Easier said than done.

Time does not heal ALL wounds.

You might be aware of destructive entitlement in your behavior but you’re not quite sure how to stop it.

You want things to shift. You want to put the past into the past, where it belongs so you can get back to feeling connected to your partner.

I know that that’s why you’re really here. It’s the reason you stayed.

You want to get your future back.

How Hypnotherapy Can Help You Get Unstuck

You might have tried traditional talk therapy, couples therapy but nothing really seems to be working.

Accelerated Hypnotherapy can help resolve what’s going on underneath your reactions. We can connect with your subconscious so you don’t feel so reactive, so there’s space in the present moment to respond the way you really want to.

With love and connection.